So I called Verizon on Thursday to make an appointment for a technician to come to my apartment. I was pleasantly surprised when they said they could send someone out the following day. “Really?” I asked. “The cable company took two weeks to just send someone over here.” Yep, just be home Friday between 8AM and 4PM, I was assured, and I’d get next-day service.

Of course, I dutifully parked my butt at home and, for fear of missing the appointment, I ventured not once into the warm sunshine that beckoned outside. And when nobody showed by 4PM, I called Verizon to express my sincere hope that some unfortunate accident did not befall the poor Verizon guy and to kindly inquire about his health and whereabouts.

The representative told me that the computer had the appointment scheduled for next Wednesday.

Thanks, Verizon.